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August

 If the last few months hadn't left me battered and dazed enough, along came the school summer holidays!😣

Late July brought good news and bad. Good because Cleo actually got a summer job, meaning that she was spending a hell of a lot less time holed up in her bedroom, face-timing her friends and boyfriend. Bad because with John and I needing to spend an increasing amount of time at work, she was less available to watch the twins. She was only working three or four days a week at a local ice-cream parlour but God did we know it on her days off!!
     "Oh my God Mum! I've been slaving away all day," she told me, after I'd done three Zoom meetings, two loads of laundry, two lasagnes (one meat, one vegan especially for her) and cleaned through the whole of the downstairs of the house. "On my actual days off, I'd just like to be able to chill, if that's ok with you," she said, languishing on the sofa in her Pink Panther onesie in front of 'Selling Sunset.'
     Grudgingly, Rosie eventually agreed to mind the twins at her place two days a week, throughout the school holidays. There was a very real possibility that Molly and Marcus would be returned to us as unspeakably feral creatures, but I felt that my options were limited. We'd have to take our chances, with a view to possibly reintegrating them into polite society throughout September. Rosie informed me that we'd have to hold off on the childcare arrangement until they got back from a week in Spain however. My heart sank when I heard this. I knew exactly what John's reaction would be.
     "Spain? Spain? They owe us all that money and they're off to Spain?" He was purple in the face, as was his usual hue whenever the subject of Rosie was under discussion.
     "She said it was an absolute bargain and that they needed a break."
     "Jesus Christ, Daisy! She works one day a week in a poncy delicatessen and I've seen Dwayne sitting outside McDonalds scoffing McMuffins without a care in the world more than once when I'm on my way to the office. Needed a break, my arse!'
     "Perhaps he was grabbing a quick breakfast on his way to work," I offered.
     "In board shorts and a hoodie? Reading the Daily Mirror? No chance. Basically, they're jetting off to Spain with our money, while we have to make do with a leaky tent in Devon. You need to speak to your sister again, Daisy."
     "I don't want to rock the boat, John. She's agreed to help out with the kids from next week and it took her a month to get over it last time I brought up the subject of money."
     "Hmph."
     "And Devon's gonna be lovely. You'll see."

To squeeze a holiday in between Cleo's shifts at the ice cream parlour, we had to settle for three nights in a camp site. We couldn't manage any more time than this, which as it turned out, was a blessing. For two of those nights, it absolutely chucked it down and yes, as John had indeed foreseen, the tent leaked. Naturally. All three kids had faces liked slapped arses for the majority of the time we were there. The twins could be distracted from their misery by means of the odd game of cards or a trip to the camp shop for sweets but Cleo only cracked a smile on the final evening, when we found a KFC with free Wifi.
     "Well this has been a resounding success!" John shouted above the gales, as he clung for dear life onto the tent that we were dismantling.
     "Oh for once in your life, will you JUST give it a rest, John? At least we managed to give the kids a holiday."
     "Holiday!" he scoffed. "They look like they've been tortured."
     I glanced over at the car, where I could just make out the kids through the misted-up windows, huddled in the back seat, bedraggled and forlorn.
     "Oh shut up!" I snapped through a mouthful of soggy hair. "One more word and I'm letting go of  this guy-line."

But it was the day after we returned home that was the real low-point of the holiday season. It came courtesy of the announcement that anyone unable to get home from Spain in the next few hours would have to quarantine for two weeks, putting pay to our childcare plans.
     "If I didn't know better, I'd swear that my sister did it deliberately," I seethed.
     "As you know, I've got very little patience when it comes to your bloody sister, but one look at the news will tell you that you can't lay this particular inconvenience at her door."
     "What are we gonna do, John? I was relying on her having them from Tuesday."
     "Well, you're gonna have to work something out between you and Cleo, aren't you?"
     "Oh I am, am I?"
     "Well, come on Daisy ...... you know ....... I've got loads on at work and the bathroom to finish too ...."
     "Oh. You've remembered the bathroom, have you? I'm glad about that. I'll call B and Q first thing in the morning to check for myself if those ever-elusive tiles have arrived in the store."
     John went suspiciously quiet after that and made me a cup of tea. Hmm 🤔

Needless to say, even after Rosie's quarantine ended, several 'issues' arose throughout the month which served to interfere with our original plan. She only ended up watching Marcus and Molly on a handful of occasions in the end. So ......  continuously juggling work and childcare in a house that still looks like a building site, it's safe to say that August has been challenging in the extreme. I'd say bring on September, but with all the worrying news reports flooding the screen about the re-opening of schools, I can't even .......... 😱
   
   
   

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