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Day 76 - The New Normal


"Have you heard from your sister?" Mum asked as we sat at opposite ends of their garden decking.
       How much does she know? If Rosie's been badmouthing me ….. 
     "What do you mean?"
     "Well, have you spoken to her or seen her? She's gone very quiet this week. I thought she might bring the children over to see us this weekend but we've not seen any of them."
     "Count yourselves lucky," mumbled Cleo, just loud enough for John and me to hear. John sniggered a bit.
      "I went over there in the week …. briefly," I said. John was looking down at his shoes now.
     "Oh, she's probably busy. Working, no doubt," she said. "Poor thing."
     "Huh!" I couldn't help saying.
     "Speaking of which …..... you're going back into the office tomorrow, aren't you darling?" asked Dad.
     "Don't bloody remind me."
     "It'll be nice to get back to some sort of normality though," said John.
     "We'll see if you're still saying that by tomorrow evening," I said.
       Mum gave an embarrassed little cough. "Well …. isn't this nice? All being able to meet up again."
     I glanced around the garden. The twins were sitting beside the hot tub, staring into it longingly. John and I had brought our own coffee in a flask which had leaked over his t shirt. Cleo looked bored shitless, even though we'd only been here for ten minutes.
     "We'll be going back out to The Dog and Ferret for early bird dinners before you know it," said Dad, happily.
     "Don't you dare!" I snapped, wiping the smile of Dad's face in an instant. "It's still dangerous out there, Dad."
     "Daisy," John said, through gritted teeth.
     "Alright Daisy. We'll be sensible. Promise," Dad said. "I was only joking."
     "Why can't we go in the hot tub?" Marcus whinged.
     "It's too risky with the virus," John said.
     "I don't see why. You can't get it from water, can you?"
     "Stop nagging, Marcus," I hissed.
     "Oh! I should have mentioned ……. your father and I will need to throw you out before 1 o'clock.  We're doing a Zoom quiz with Sylvia and Derek White," Mum said.
     "Charming!"

"I've laid out the twins' clothes for the morning and put a pasta sauce in the fridge for lunch. So you'll just have to boil up a bit of spaghetti or something. I'll put a wash in before I leave, so make sure that you get it onto the line or it'll smell. Oh …… and can you make sure that the kids finish writing their book reviews, please? They're due in on Tuesday. John? John? Are you listening to me, John?
     "Sorry, Daisy. What were you saying? Come over to the window to see this. Gordon's painting his fence. Strange colour. Is it brown or orange, do you think?"
     "D' you know, John …..maybe I'm well out of this bullshit!"
     "What've I done now?"

So …..  it's been 76 Days since Boris announced 'Lockdown'. 76 days of Netflix, home-schooling and chats on Zoom. 76 days of social distancing, antibac wipes and too much wine and chocolate. I'm not going to deny that there have been moments, but all in all, I feel like we've been getting through it quite well. Evidence supporting this opinion:
  • John and I are still married to each other. I haven't even needed to Google divorce lawyers.
  • We have decided to keep all three kids and indeed Dennis, the cat.
  • We haven't gone hungry, nor have I had to compromise my morals in order to get hold of essential items.
  • We haven't had to resort to wiping our nether regions on newspapers or leaves, due to any failure on my part to provide toilet paper.
  • Due to the freakishly hot weather, I have been forced to keep my leg hair under control and my eyebrows have yet to meet in the middle. 
  • So far, no one in our household has contracted the virus, which is the biggest bonus of all!

Very hesitantly, I feel life slipping back into a pattern vaguely resembling normality. We'll have a different normality for a while, I guess.
     So ….. tonight, I set an alarm for 6.30 am and take a last slug of wine to see me on my way into the actual world outside. I'll update you on how it goes, at the weekend 😘

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